English and shit - a synopsis.

Unless you are living under rock that's being covered by a set of incrementally bigger rocks, you are somehow and somewhat affected by the English language. The mere fact that virtually every single one of you understood ninety-five percent of the previous sentence, is testament to that. I put in the word 'incrementally' because, you know, I am a bit of a daft bastard. On TV, in music, in video games, when traveling to any country that isn't France; the English language is omnipresent in our lives. Choosing to ignore it, is the intellectual equivalent of moving into an abandoned bus somewhere in northern Alaska. I will try to prove my point in the following ... things.

"Is this supposed to be funny?", I often think when I stumble upon a comedy show on Flemish television. I can virtually see you rehearsing your so-called spontaneous jokes. And the laugh track expertly fills up the awkward silence following your weak attempt at dialect. I get so confounded that I start to doubt my own sense of humor. People seem to like this stuff, because papers and social media are rife with references to these shows. Maybe it's because we need some sort of shared value. "Let's all agree to at least like this thing on TV, because otherwise there is no more common ground left." Like a comedy Red Devils. There is a multitude of media outlets out there, on which you can enjoy all kinds of comedy shows, series, games, films, comics... Most of them are in English. But can you relate to others? When you're forced to talk to that colleague in the elevator, it is hard to open with 'you happen to see the latest episode of Last Week Tonight? You know, that hilarious HBO show that you can't see on TV, but have to download or watch online?' I can feel their eyes burning straight through my skull... 

Now, I don't want to imply that there is something like superior taste. Please no. I just want to point out is that these British and American shows operate in a very competitive market. When ratings drop, shows get canceled without a second thought. Therefore, they have to be at the top of their game every single time. To achieve this, they have a skilled team of writers backing up the host. Flemish shows can afford a dip in quality now and then, because there aren't many alternatives in our language market. Also, they can't afford top notch writers because the scope of the market is too small. As a sort-of-social being, I like to relate to other people, so I am practically forced to watch these not-so-funny shows to gather reference material. First world problems, you say? Damn straight!

Same goes for music. If I didn't come across as a bit of a dick in the previous paragraphs, I most probably will after this. Here's why: I think many people out there prefer Flemish mediocrity over foreign quality, and they can't be bothered if you tell them so. But before you go and grab the pitchfork and light the torch: they are not to blame, and again, it is not about taste. There's a big, big world out there - remember Emilia? Sorry for that - and, consequently, there is no boundary for musical exploration, except for the limitations that you impose on yourself. The interwebs enables you to listen to the latest release of your favorite artists, and if you feel like exploring, you will even find a selection of the top 100 Papuan tribal chants, for that matter. All in a heartbeat. Some people, however, choose not to choose life. They choose something else.

Let me try and explain. Surely, society has evolved into an individualistic first-come, first-served rat race, but that does not blot out our inherent need to be social. So we look for places to meet each other, either physically or virtually. And unless you're a psychopath, you will adapt yourself to this social situation. You'll take the edge of your more extreme opinions, you'll express empathy for people you don't really care about. And when it comes to trivialities, you stick to what is perceived as commonly known. The weather, traffic jams, football, taxes,... Want to talk about media and culture? Think local. National TV and local artists. Don't come up with anything out of the ordinary or soon you'll be holding an awkward monologue. Maybe you're trying to impress someone with your cultural prowess, hoping to pry open their narrow minds to insert a broader world view. If they're nice, they'll nod along, but most probably forget about it before the end of the day. Rarely, they'll pick something up and refer to it the next time you meet.

We thirty-somethings already have so many things on our minds, don't we? Coping with everyday life. Kids. The job. Making a healthy dinner. Buying garbage bags. 'Don't come and bother me with your world views and all that. It's hard enough already to keep my own shit going. How come you still have time for adolescent thoughts like that!?' Some people, however, use this as a standard defense against any opinion that gets them out of their comfort zone, afraid that they might be singled out and targeted by other advocates of political correctness. Unless, of course, they are absolutely certain that everybody shares their thoughts. Murder. Violence against children. Sexual deviance. The otherwise mute will overcompensate for their lack of spine by vilifying any kind of obvious perpetrator. Yes, these people have committed atrocious crimes, but will you be the executioner? Go ahead, I'll even sharpen my favorite beheading sword for you.

Err, Wim, music!? Well, the people I'm so generously profiling will stick to whatever is popular among friends, in the papers or in social media, i.e. local bands supported by smart marketing, and foreign bands supported by even smarter marketing (Hello, Adele?). They will grow to like it, maybe even genuinely, and that's it for them. Anything out of this circle is alternative, marginal, waste of subsidies, whatever. And what really ticks me off is that it is often these people who dare to say that everything sounds the same these days. Aargh...

I'm not reaching a proper conclusion - I fully understand that I am just pissing in the wind here - because in the back of my mind, I know many of you aren't like that at all. When you drive along with me, I'll even let you touch the radio. If you're really, really nice.